My Agent Said "I think you'll get this published"!!!!

Today I got a Positive Response From My Literary Agent!

 

Today I got a Positive Response From My Literary Agent!

September of 2011, my mother, Jo Lyn Bartz, passed away after a month in the hospital from respiratory failure.  This summer, I began writing a memoir to share the story of surviving and thriving in a family with genetic disease, telling how I lost my mother and brother to myotonic dystrophy.  I sent my first query letters to agents July 14^th of this year.  3 hours later, I had a positive response from an agent.  I then started extensive research on how to create a complete proposal for literary non-fiction, and created a complete proposal ready for agents and book contests.  July 18^th I had a positive response from Quest Magazine in publishing an article excerpt from my memoir, From My Mother.  On September 26^th, I sent my complete proposal to my literary agent, including links to my newly published article and a poem which was selected to a Kansas poem of the week in September (http://150kansaspoems.wordpress.com/2013/09/02/mom-dad-and-dustin-on-the-beach-of-the-great-salt-lake-1997-by-darcy-leech/). 

Since then I have written to page 156 and have an almost complete draft.  I still have to write the hardest part of the book, recounting my mother’s last days in long-term critical care in Wichita.  I’ve been dragging my feet in writing in part because the end of the book is so emotionally charged that it changed my mood for a few days to relive it all to write.  I know the story is important, and I know the writing is worth it.  I had been waiting on The Christopher Doheny Award to announce a winner to hopefully gain some motivation or have more direction (http://www.centerforfiction.org/awards/the-christopher-doheny-award/).  Originally, the award was supposed to be named by the end of November.  I emailed when it wasn’t posted Dec. 1^st, and found out the announcement had been delayed to January. 

I had felt a little stalled, started spending my free time playing with Magic cards or other distractions rather than writing, avoiding the catharsis of writing the final chapter.  Over summer I had a Bible study with great and wise women who prayed for me every Tuesday and encouraged my writing.  I felt so much momentum over summer I was sure I was going to be published and felt very proud of myself to be a paid author after getting the check in my hands and physical copy of my Quest Magazine article (http://darcyleech.blogspot.com/2013/10/beyond-willpower-caring-for-brother-and.html) .  Then, since October, writing felt slow, the momentum felt as if it dwindled, and as a busy teacher, I began to think next summer I would pick the project up again. 

Then today, Dec. 5^th, I got this email:

Hi, Darcy, you have done a wonderful job of presenting your work, but I think that you can make this stronger. I am going to offer thoughts that you can take or leave, but they are meant to try to help you achieve the goal of publishing this book.

 

Your marketing sections are superb. No changes there. Your chapter summaries are fine; they indicate the flow of the story in a clean, straightforward way.

 

Basically, I like your handling of the story, but there just isn't enough texture in it yet--that's my opinion, of course. Storytelling is a very challenging art. You have to guide the reader in terms of pacing, conjuring up images of places and people, and so on.

 

Take another look at your sample material and ask yourself if someone would be able to get enough images and grasp of emotions to make a great movie out of it.

 

I don't think this needs a huge amount of work, but I would like to see you take it up a notch in terms of literary quality.

 

I hope you will feel comfortable coming back to me when you do this; if you think that my advice isn't useful, I understand. I think you will get this published; I'm just trying to nudge you along a bit more so this book is the best it can be.

 

Kind regards, ** my possibly favorite person ever if this works out ***

 

My agent gave me a specific task, positive feedback, and thinks I will get published!

 

Amazing, wonderful, beautiful news! 

I shouted in joy when I read that email then commenced to dance around the room with my husband, Daniel, until my son wanted to join in and asked us to play ‘ring around the rosie,’ which we did.

 

My momentum is back. I have a story worth telling.  My mother’s legacy will be honored and people will know a little more of what it means to be part of a family with genetic disease because I will write and publish From My Mother. 

 

What I need now are readers.  I need to add more sensory details,  I need to show my reader what is happening.  I need to increase the literary merit of my first draft.  Who’s with me? 

 

(I’ll pay, or mention you in a published book’s acknowledgments – which ever you prefer!)

 

Game on!  Let’s make this happen.

 

 

 

Why there is One Santa Astronaught Ornament on the Tree

Why I Kept One Santa on the Tree - continuation of yesterday's post

 

                Santa may have become symbolic of modern American consumerism with an image detracting from the true spirit of Christmas, but the story does get some things right.  To be fair to the argument I presented last post (http://darcyleech.blogspot.com/2013/12/why-there-are-no-santa-ornaments-except.html) about how we should be more purposeful in how we choose to celebrate holidays, I want to tell you why I DID keep one Santa on our tree in reach of my impressionable toddler.

                My son already knows about Santa, has seen Santa ‘in person’ and seen gifts unwrapped that were from Santa.  Like it or not, Santa is part of the mythos of America and my son has zero chance of growing up without Santa entering his realm of influence.  I’m not out to destroy the image of Santa in my house, but I am out to disarm the mythology of Santa and not give the consumerist ethos power over my child before he is old enough to make his own decisions.

                I want to read Eli the Santa story one day, when he is older, when he can differentiate fact from fantasy, and when his good habits are in place longer.  Grown men who know Santa is not real do good things in the image of Santa, collecting toys for the less fortunate, giving of themselves, and bringing joy through good cheer.  Santa isn’t iconoclastic or vile in a way that the image doesn’t deserve a place in our lives; in fact, Santa deserves a purposeful place in our lives – as an acknowledged symbol of good will used in modern America to spur consumerist sales and promote ‘cradle to the grave advertising’ by targeting children’s emotions and irrational hopes. 

                The Santa story has good aspects.  We should be encouraged to give to people.  Santa gives toys to everyone, regardless of race, social status, or prestige and instead judges on people’s choices and what the individual has control over rather than what they are born into.  Santa wants to help others.  Santa cares about benevolence.  Santa is a philanthropist.  All of those are respectable traits. 

                The ornament of Santa that did make it on to our tree is an astronaut.  It’s humorous to think of old man Santa visiting space in a defunct missile program with his beard outside his oxygen helmet.  Santa the astronaut poses no threat to my son’s ethical and financial future because this Santa is obviously fantastical, perhaps even slightly a parody of how Santa travels the world in one night. 

                I don’t want my son to embrace the consumerist mentality presented by the modern image of Santa, but when he is old enough, I certainly want him to acknowledge the story of Santa, the intended moral of the story, and one day when he is old enough, how Santa’s image is used by those who wish to gain from other’s spending.  We still have Santa in our house; I don’t mind children around Eli enjoying Santa or talking about Santa, or Eli getting Santa wrapping paper on his gifts.  (I might have to apologize if my son repeats what I have told him about Santa not being real, but Eli wouldn’t be the only influence in the world to blurt out that idea…) 

                Part of the power in looking at the shift and impact of the modern American Santa ideology and the trend in consumerism that has become Black Friday shifting into Thanksgiving after dinner work and shopping for a things based society is that after we acknowledge the lurking influences that may come with Santa, we can find a peaceful equilibrium in knowing how to approach the Santa mythology with our children. 

                My son knows Santa isn’t real.  He also knows that dragons aren’t real (I think…). He isn’t going to send a gift list to any dragons or Santa and I’m not going encourage his believe in either entity rewarding his behavior through magical means.  Eli has a dragon toy in the house he likes to pretend play fly with.  There’s a Christmas ornament of Santa on the tree Eli may take a natural interest in.  However, I’m not going to purposefully promote a myth embedded with consumerism and lack of logical financial restraints.  I’m going to make sure my son knows the quality of truth about Santa and purposefully protect my son from the media and corporate manipulation of an image which works wonders on a child’s imagination. 

                In short, I don’t have to actively work against Santa to encourage my son to form values based on Christianity before consumerism.  I’m not worried about Santa being around my child, but I will prepare him and have adult talk about what the Santa myth carries with it in a world out to liberate you from your dollars and your restraint.  I don’t believe that purposefully deciding not to make Santa an emphasis of our family holiday should threaten those who do.  I don’t mind if your personal choice is to have your children believe in Santa, I just hope you are purposeful in this parenting choice and consider the larger social aspects of the Modern American Santa image has become.

                I don’t mind Santa as an astronaut ornament on my tree, I just purposefully won’t give him any power beyond that.

While being purposeful in deciding how to treat modern American holidays, hopefully you ponder the

Why There are No Santa Ornaments (except the astronaut one) on Our Christmas Tree

(opinionated faith based writing - fair warning)

            Last night while decorating the tree, I hid three Santa ornaments that had been on our tree in the past and only let the astronaut Santa go on our tree explaining what the space helmet would do for his breathing.   My son has yet to sit on Santa’s lap and will never write a letter to the North Pole at my command.  My two year old son Eli has been told more often that Santa isn’t real than he has unwrapped a Christmas present.   Am I a super-strict mother controlling her son’s imagination and limiting the joy of Christmas?  Perhaps.  What I am doing is purposefully raising my son to not believe in Santa.

            To children, Santa represents a benevolent man with magic powers who delivers presents based on behavior and merit.  To parents, Santa represents a system of check and balances on behavior and an excuse to indulge in extravagant present buying for their children.  To companies, Santa represents a profit line, increased consumerism, and a feel good atmosphere based on product and payment not associated to need.  To non-believers, Santa represents a harmless entry way to enjoy a traditional American Holiday.    To this believer, Santa represents a belief in ‘things’ which are given regardless of need based on behavioral merit.

            Now trust me, I don’t rally against magic and enjoy card games with creatures like minotaurs and shows like Lord of the Rings or Chronicles of Narnia.  My problem with Santa isn’t in his magic or that he is fictional.  My problem with Santa is that the image and message distract from the ethos of unmerited grace, intangible gifts of the spirit, and giving more of ourselves than we give to ourselves (or our household). 

            Our house is decorated for Christmas, equipped with a pre-lit Christmas tree, little people Nativity set, Avon toddler Nativity set, Willow Tree Nativity set, and angel tree topper.  Some might argue that three nativity sets is an equal sign of consumerism, and if I didn’t have them all given to me or see my son put his hands on baby Jesus, make pretend cry sounds, then try to comfort baby Jesus, I’d probably agree.  My son’s main learning environment is my house.  His personality, character, and ethical views are being formed today as I type while he plays with Thomas the Train in the living room.  My son is impressionable, and the impressions around him now will impact him for years to come.  I believe I should be purposeful in how my household reacts to traditional American holidays, including the decision in whether or not to embrace Santa.

            I asked myself – what benefit is brought by a belief in Santa when my son already knows the story of Jesus?  Santa might encourage my son’s imagination, or help him look forward to Christmas; however, what would his focus on Christmas be?  Looking over Black Friday ads for things to ask for?  Behaving and doing nice things so that he can be extrinsically rewarded by a false personality type with unlimited resources?  Does Santa represent something I want my son to idolize?

            Consumerism is rampant in a society of affluence.  Gifts will be given on credit card.  16 year olds will be given smart phones and six month later be told to find a job so they can pay the two year contract and be tied to the phone financially.  People stood in line for hours on Black Friday to buy gifts for people who said things like “I really don’t need anything.”  Living rooms will be piled with over 10 gifts a person and some of those gifts will remain in the box to hide in the basement, or be exchanged for something else, or sold on ebay.  Christmas will be spent with teenagers shooting guns and stealing cars on Grand Theft Auto, or people testing the internet search restrictions on their new tablet to see if they now have a sneakier way to avoid a visible internet history.

            My husband and I are both professionals able to pay our monthly bills and chose to put money into savings.  If we have true needs, we meet the need that month.  If we have wants, we plan accordingly and try not to buy on impulse.  We want to instill financial responsibility in our son so that he can manage his wants and needs and not acquire a house full of clutter.  Santa does not fit our financial planning model.  Santa does not model financial planning.  Santa has no budget, no resource allocation, and unlimited time apparently.  It could stunt a person’s financial planning ability to indulge in a yearly fantasy about a man who gifts everyone from his unlimited resource pull based on behavior.  Santa being so key to the American version of Christ’s birthday has sold the emphasis from a celebration of the gift of grace to the indulgence in gifts bought with money.  To allude to the Bible, we give often not with the spirit of Christ, but with the power of what is Caesar’s.  The dollar often determines our enjoyment of Jesus’ birthday.  Jesus didn’t come to help us enjoy our dollar bills more.

            A family atmosphere that encourages belief in Santa also encourages children to want what they don’t have and don’t need, as if those resources fall from the sky with parachutes from sleighs.  Parents ask children to create lists, creating desires that weren’t present before and may not have an easy end point.  This need isn’t sated only once; Santa comes yearly.  Add in birthdays, and children are expected to produce wants at least twice a year.  Do we really need that much stuff?  Do our children?  Should we have a culture where we expect everyone to have list for Christmas so it is easier to check their name off a list of gift buying?

            Santa is perfect for consumerism as the image produces and encourages desire for pleasing things not attached to need and viewed as if the items are from a stream of limitless resources.  This ethic controls the modern Christmas too often in America.  Why should we have to produce false needs so that people feel good in buying unnecessary gifts?  Why have we been so conditioned to get the endorphin rush unwrapping gifts and in swiping our plastic to buy gifts for those who don’t need anything they can’t buy themselves?  Why is there acceptable social pressure to buy into consumerism on a holiday about unconditional grace?  Why do we pass that on to our children?

            Santa was not intended to be subversive to the message of Christ.  Saint Nicolas is a long ways from the American Santa of 2013 though.  The key ideas of Santa’s image are counter to the Christian message in the story of Christ.  Christ does not give us physical tangible rewards on earth based on how much we please our parents or the rules of society.  When Jesus overturned the money-changers’ tables, he probably got knocked off Santa’s nice list for socially unacceptable behavior that hurt others’ feelings.  Christ died for our sins to give us the overflowing gift of Grace.  Santa keeps a list of our sins to see if we end on the naughty or nice list.  Christ denounced the power of government coined currency; Santa drives the power of government coined currency.  Christ encourages us to be good for heavenly rewards; Santa encourages us to be good to receive gifts from the power of man that make our life on earth more pleasurable, perhaps even pleasure based. 

            ‘Black’ Friday is probably the day the most ‘Santa’ gifts are bought.  Black Friday can take away from family time, shift the holiday of Thanksgiving from gratitude to greed and set up Christmas to be based on earthly pleasures over heavenly gifts and the ultimate sacrifice of forgiveness and grace.  Check the Black Friday youtube videos to see the extremes or go here:  http://www.bing.com/search?q=walmart+black+friday+fight&form=msnhpm&refig=8df5b1fabaf14f71af70011478ab5cec .The name ‘black’ comes from the ledger book and negative numbers being red and profits being black, but isn’t it ironic that our latest national holiday is a celebration of the materialism of hyper consumerism in America and detracts from the holy purpose of the Christmas celebration?

            It feels good to give gifts, and pretty good to get them.  It is probably pretty pleasant to see a child’s face light up from Santa listening to a whole list of the child’s desires.  A lot of things feel good.  Jeremiah 17:9 admonished “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?”  Is the feel good heart warming of the modern American Santa filled Christmas where we are meant to be?  I’m not out to change America or tell you how to live your life, but my personal answer to that question is no.  That ‘no’ is why my son has been told more times than he has unwrapped a Christmas gift that Santa isn’t real. 

            Proverbs 3:5-6 hangs in my kitchen: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding; ⁶ In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct^[a] your paths.”  Santa is cute, and the image brings pleasure to lots of people.  However, cute and pleasing does not mean Santa is right to idolize in the formative years of building my son’s character.  I love Christmas, and I believe the holiday has purpose, meaning, and fills families with joy.  I want my son to know that joy.  I want my son to know the reason for The Season.  I want him to play with the toy sheep and cow and camel and pretend play the three wise men bringing gifts to Jesus.  I want his joy in Christmas to come from family and spirituality and knowing he is saved because Christ bought the greatest gift of all with a sacrifice not present in the ageless undying form of Santa.  I want my son to enjoy Christmas, but I don’t want the consumerist pleasure based X-mas drive for dollar signs to color his perception of the most important holiday of our faith.  Purposefully, as for me and my house, we will not believe in Santa and will try to avoid the consumerist rush of a ‘things’ based Christmas. 

            Jesus is the reason for the season.  As parents, I think we have a responsibility to purposefully consider how we approach holidays in our household.  Happy Holidays!  May the season find you well.  God be with you in the Christmas season.

What to put in the introduction to your Research Paper

A video I made to use with my English III juniors (about 30-50 kids a year) hit 11,000 views lately!  Education is a lot more accessible these days with the internet...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G50ggZFE1HY

Donation Request for Reward Items for hardworking Intensive Reading students

I'm asking for donated items to reward my Intensive Reading Sophomore (10th grade) students with at the end of the semester for at home reading. These students are working hard to bring their reading comprehension scores to grade level and some have read over 1000 pages at home. Help me encourage them with rewards for our December reading celebration!

https://www.facebook.com/events/319756671496572/?ref_newsfeed_story_type=regular

These students are working hard to improve their reading abilities, be on grade level, and graduate high school!

I have two classes of intensive reading students who are working hard to raise their reading levels. Help me reward their additional practice reading at home with donate prizes for our end of semester party. The kids cleaned me out a bit in our first semester party. I had two reading students with over 1000 pages and many more who had read hundreds of pages at home, something they had never done before!

Some reward ideas include:

Young Adult literature books (the students have reading levels between 3rd and 10th grade)

Gift cards

Games (card games, board games, video games)

Warm clothing

Snacks

Posters

Backpack

school supplies

Portable technology like an iPod or Nano

Contact me with ideas you have to make a donation. 

 

Resiliency is a Family Trait

article in the Great Bend Tribune about my cousins, aunt, and uncle:

A Father's Pride Larned player follows playoff footsteps 28 years later http://www.gbtribune.com/section/41/article/62302/ By Jim Misunas Area Reporter jmisunas@gbtribune.com

Larned's Jeromy Bartz runs behind blockers Jeramie Kramer (53) and Skyler Hoch (52) against Pratt. Bartz wore both No. 5 and No. 58 on the night.

LARNED — When Jeromy Bartz plays in Larned High’s first football playoff game in 28 years, he’ll think of his father.
He always does.
Larned (7-2) travels today as a heavy underdog against state-ranked Andale (9-0), a Class 4A perennial state contender.
But Jeromy and his freshman brother, Brandon, are accustomed to accepting challenges without their father Michael, who died in July due to a heart attack. Their parents, Michael and Sandi, were Larned High classmates who were destined to be together.
Jeromy’s father, Michael Bartz, played on Larned’s last playoff team in 1985. But Michael didn’t get a chance to see the first playoff appearance for his sons.
“We’d talk about football often,” Jeromy said. “I know he’d be proud of us. I think about him all the time.”
Nothing has come easy for Larned football, which has slowly gained momentum the past two years under the quiet confidence of head coach A.B. Stokes.
Pratt High led 14-7 last week in the fourth quarter against Larned, which had its playoff hopes on the line.
“Last year, we might have panicked, but this year we’ve been behind and come back,” Bartz said. “We’ve learned to stay calm and keep fighting and winning one play at a time.”
Sure enough, Larned quarterback Easton Palmer flipped the momentum with a 66-yard touchdown pass to Brayden Smith. A few plays later, Trey Kraisinger returned an interception 32 yards for the game-winning touchdown. Jamil Shoemaker added an insurance touchdown for good measure in a 27-14 victory.  It marked Larned's first victory over Pratt since 1996.
“It took a long time to sink in what we’d done because nothing like has ever happened to us,” Bartz said. “I give all the credit to our whole senior class working together as leaders.
“This year, we expected more out of ourselves,” he said. “We figured ‘Why not us?’ We worked hard every day and no one deserved it more.”
Jeromy is the Indians’ most versatile players. When the 5-8, 185-pounder lines up in the backfield, he’ll wear No. 5. But coach Stokes occasionally plays him at offensive guard when he’s No. 58 or No. 66, which his uncle Arlan Bartz used to wear for the Larned Indians. He’s one of Larned’s leading tacklers at inside linebacker.
“I’d rather play defense,” he said.
Jeromy credits coach Stokes and his staff for gradually instilling a more positive attitude.
“When I started high school, no one talked about the football team and when we got behind, we stayed down,” he said. “But coach Stokes changed our attitudes and started stressing the weight room.”
Stokes’ other message was the football players needed to support the school’s other teams. More than 20 football players attended Larned’s first state volleyball appearance since 1971 last weekend.
“It was good team building,” he said.
He said the Indians are matching opponent's work ethic. The Indians have met the challenge physically at the line of scrimmage.
“Now, we’ve gotten guys talking about football and guys out who haven’t played football before,” he said. “The big difference is we’ve gotten on the weights.”
Jeromy has big playoff dreams, but he’s realistic.
“It’s really a good opportunity to test our mettle against one of top teams in Class 4A,” he said.

Jeromy is number 5 on defense.

Michael Bartz, younger brother of my father Randy

On the difficulty of writing on a recent loss

Writing about my mother has been hard.  In fact, I’ve covered every member of the family known to have myotonic dystrophy except her.  I’ve spent about a month not writing about her after writing a great deal in a short time about my brother and myotonic dystrophy.  I’m not sure what has made writing about my mother so hard. Maybe I figure I don’t have the time to cry, or maybe I just don’t want to write the most important story of my life in 20 minute increments after Eli goes to bed.

My mother’s last month in the hospital (or was it two?) was probably the most turbulent and transformational time of my life.  My first child was three months old when my mother was on her deathbed.  I was nursing my son when the life support was stopped on my mother.  Life and death danced together that month in the way that preteen boys dance with preteen girls, an awkward slowness with a promise of better days to come.  

Tonight I’ve written two paragraphs in 10 minutes.  I don’t know what I felt in that hospital. I don’t remember how long my mother was in the hospital.  None of it looking back makes sense, the timeline isn’t clear, I’m not sure if I’m angry, or sad, or purposefully numb.  I don’t want to look at the medical records, I’m not sure how to obtain them.  We've talked a few times; however, my father doesn’t really like to talk about it often. I don't either.

I was angry at the doctors at times, angry at myself for not noticing, angry at God.  I was thankful for the visitors, thankful for still having my mother, even if she couldn’t talk to me, thankful for the life God gave me.  I was confused about what was happening, strangely fatalistic, blindly hopeful, and yet peacefully resigned.  I wanted more time, I wanted it to end faster, I wanted to change the past, I wanted a different future.  I wanted my mother to hold me, talk to me, teach me how to raise a child, listen to me cry about the loss of sleep an infant brings, come live with me for the first six months of when I returned to work and watch Eli. 
 
My life changed when my mother went into the hospital.  The night I got the phone call my mother-in-law was at our house having a serious family talk with my husband.  I took the phone call from my father on the back porch.  He said he had taken mom to the ER, but it didn’t seem like anything serious.  I tried to wait until Daniel and my mother-in-law were done talking to drop my family’s trouble in the middle of their conversation.  I should have went then.  I should have told Daniel immediately and taken off for Great Bend. Then maybe I could have talked to my mother when she was in the hospital.  I went that night, but already she couldn’t speak. 

I’m not sure why she couldn’t speak.  I don’t remember if she were too drugged, sleeping, or if the tracheotomy tube were already down her neck.  I’m pretty sure it was the tube was already down her neck; I remember she couldn’t get the surgery to put the tubing
on the outside of her neck for a while because it was a small town and the doctor who would perform the surgery kept having to leave town or do other things.

I’m happy and I have regrets, I’m at peace and I’m unresolved. How does a daughter make sense of the death of her mother?  How do the living grapple with the nature of death?  Do we have good answers?  Will I be able to write about my mother later?  Will I understand God’s plan in my mother’s final months?  Will I one day have a good answer for myself about why I was born without the genetic strain that took my mother and brother?  Do I have to understand the morality, rationality, or even remember the details of the situation to write about it?

                I miss my mother.  I loved her.  I am formed and built by her love.  She was an amazing woman, and I carry her spirit in my heart.  The painting of mother and child that she kept in my nursery is on the wall in Eli’s nursery.  I don’t know what to think, I don’t know what to write, I’m not really sure what I learned, I can’t really tell you how I felt. 

                My favorite answer to life’s questions lately? “That’s life”.  Sometimes the complexity of life doesn’t have much room for questions, and sometimes living trumps understanding.  I’m not going to wait on living until I have understanding, not going to stop feeling because I’m not sure what I felt.  I want to write about my mother.  I want to understand myself and my life enough to write about it.  I don’t yet. I’m living, I’m praying, I’m thinking, and I’m trying.  I just don’t have great answers yet.  That’s life.

                So for now, I’m content trying to write about why I really can’t write about the loss of my mother.  Here’s to time, prayer, and reflection…

((originally posted April 4, 2013 at 10:07pm on facebook notes))

 

Mom helping me paint in 2007